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Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Fri Oct 24, 2008 10:37 pm
by afrigeek
I liked the way Jason handled the politics..

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sat Oct 25, 2008 8:22 am
by montie1123
Aye that was done very well, though i have to admit i had to skip the whole first part of the story as i dont care to read about what it was about. Over all yet another great chapter.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sat Oct 25, 2008 7:18 pm
by IdiotPaste
Jason is becoming quite the statesman. All that without any assistance from Zaa, not too shabby.

I think the first part wasn't about future Tim and Jason fun. I think Fel was trying to convey how important Tim is to Jason and how close all four of them are.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sat Oct 25, 2008 10:35 pm
by Cougar2k2
I didn't know if you people don't mind me pointing out the obvious, I think that the title 'Unification' didn't just apply to House Karinne but the entire milkyway galaxy :shock: :roll: . With of course House Karinne setting all up... and I'm also still not convinced that the Exiled Karinnes are all innocent in the scheme of things. I mean what could be worse then the head of this forming 'alliance' becoming bogged down with internal struggles of its own destroying its credability? Kinda like cutting the head of the snake to kill it. Not literally for those of you animal activites out there, thats figuratively. :lol: I haven't checked or remember but I'd be surprised if this was the first time its been mentioned in the forums.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sat Oct 25, 2008 11:29 pm
by Mysterious
Yeah I agree with your thoughts about 'Unification' across the galaxy... :o

But I am more than suprised (and a little bit disturbed :shock: ) that none of the Kimdori within Jason's service has pointed out (or started to mitigate) the potential and substantial liability the Exile Karinnes possess to Karis and the greater war effort.




Mysterious

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:20 am
by dellstart
Great chapter!

Lots of Interesting developments.

1)Its interesting to see amu dozei from the inside.Though part of me feels he showing this to us , cause one or more of these fellow's is going to get whacked and its going to prove that much more devastating .you have been warned. :(

2)The ship will reveal some secrets the question is just what.

3) We see a developing relationship, with his children. With Dahani for that matter as well.

4)As has been said above , Our Jason has really developed into a real statesman.His handling of the situation has been perfect.

5)Like Anti carrot has said in the first chapter.I quote

" Very possible. But I'm not sure what it would get them. Even if they've replaced some of the colonists with pod-people, the colonists aren't likely to get near any secure areas, or pass any security scans. I can't imagine any useful device the Consortium could smuggle back with the colony either. Beyond a large bomb that could provide a minor distraction at a critical time."

That whilst there may be something afoot, there's not that great a danger they can pose. Perhaps this is the reason for the kimodri,s lack of worry at the possibility of an Exile fifth column.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:28 am
by Fel
montie1123 wrote:Aye that was done very well, though i have to admit i had to skip the whole first part of the story as i dont care to read about what it was about. Over all yet another great chapter.
Sometimes the reality of things can be a little disturbing.

You'd think that Jason couldn't be affected by the same bond that affected Jyslin and Symone? Not quite the same way, because of his much stronger aversion to a same sex relationship, but it shows the true power of the bond of amu dozei, which shatters almost all boundaries.

That's the power of telepathy, in all its stark glory.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 4:52 am
by Fel
IdiotPaste wrote:I think the first part wasn't about future Tim and Jason fun. I think Fel was trying to convey how important Tim is to Jason and how close all four of them are.
Just about right on.

Jason and Tim won't go there because of a lack of desire to do so (neither of them have those impulses), but the point of that part of the story was to show just how powerful the bond between them is.

And yes, Tim is a very, very important part of Jason's life. They were best friends long before they entered into the bond of amu dozei.

Oh, and yes...I kinda expected a mixed reaction about that part of the story. It was MEANT to surprise, and maybe shock a little bit.

Did I get my point across? ;)

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 10:12 am
by Metatrone
About the surprise, sure did. And I really did skip a part of it. I'm not all that homophobic but it puts me off. And this was way too much thought put in establishing Tim is important to Jason.

Btw, Fel, I've got a question. Lately I've notice that when you go introspective, or the character makes a big speech (exp. Jason -Chapter One about Leaving the Island), you tend to repeat the same thing a few times with slightly different phrasing. It reminds me of an American microeconomics teacher I had. I was wondering, is it intentional, or do you loose track of the text, or perhaps you picked it up at school unconsciously?

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 1:43 pm
by Mistra
Î what he said.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:45 pm
by Fel
Metatrone wrote:About the surprise, sure did. And I really did skip a part of it. I'm not all that homophobic but it puts me off. And this was way too much thought put in establishing Tim is important to Jason.

Btw, Fel, I've got a question. Lately I've notice that when you go introspective, or the character makes a big speech (exp. Jason -Chapter One about Leaving the Island), you tend to repeat the same thing a few times with slightly different phrasing. It reminds me of an American microeconomics teacher I had. I was wondering, is it intentional, or do you loose track of the text, or perhaps you picked it up at school unconsciously?
Well, I could say I'm sorry for offending sensibilities...but I'm not. If you squirmed uncomfortably in your chair when you read the first page of the chapter, then I consider that me doing my job. Trust me, I was squirming a bit myself, and I knew some wouldn't like it, but I've said before, the story writes itself. I'm as much along for the ride as you are. ;)

As to your question? Got me. I just write. What I get at the end is what I get. Maybe I try to redefine a point and neglect to go back and delete previous attempts, who knows.

That or I'm in love with that "total word count" number at the bottom of Word.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 7:20 pm
by J-Man5
I've wondered if this relationship for Tim and Jacye will let/cause the foursome to become a sixsome with Dahnai and her mate. Never know if a Faey male may push Tim or Jacye's buttons...

J-Man5

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 9:38 pm
by Metatrone
Well you don't have to worry about the word count, that'a for sure. You beat anyone I've read so far hands down, and I've read just about anything.
Tough this "the story writes itself" thing has got me worried. Last time I said something is weird, you went bananas with the animal connection i Spirit. It was Kyven the Arcan Whisperer.

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 12:17 am
by ANTIcarrot
Fel wrote:Well, I could say I'm sorry for offending sensibilities...but I'm not.
For the record, I approve of this. One of the things I dislike about mainstream 'pheromone' style plots is how it is always very careful to avoid the kinds of hilarious consequences that would happen in real life.
If you squirmed uncomfortably in your chair when you read the first page of the chapter, then I consider that me doing my job.
Sorry Fel, I'm a 10 year veteran Furry. There is very likely absolutely nothing you could write that would shock me. 8) :roll: :twisted:

Re: Unification- Chapter 2 - Spoilers

Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:28 am
by MrNerdHair
Well, I didn't like the first part either, too much squickage. At first my theory was that Fel hadn't written any stuff as hot-'n-steamy as the Subjugation universe stuff generally is, and that he was going a little batty and overloading on his need to write something extremely NSFW. However, on second thought, I can recognize the value of writing about that sort of thing: all along in this universe, Fel has been trying to impress upon the reader that telepathy is a MAJOR distinguishing factor between ordinary humans and telepaths. I used to think of the Faey as blue-skinned humans with telepathy. Which they are, but thinking that way invites thinking about them as humans with this random cool power, sort of like Superman or something. But descriptions of how non-telepathic people interact with telepaths, and how the Faey's telepathy is their greatest weapon, and how the Faey society is different because females have greater telepathic power than males, and so forth can only go so far to making telepathy come across as more than a really neat power, plot device, and character trait. But by describing the relationship of amu dozei in such intimate and disturbing detail, it makes it abundantly clear that telepathy is a powerful, character-changing thing, something that makes telepaths fundamentally different from non-telepaths. Before I used to see the species distinction between Faey and humans as a tenuous one. However, being a male, I know that a male's instinctual revulsion to sex with another male is an extremely powerful thing (as evidenced by the fact that I didn't like that part of the chapter). The power of telepathy is underscored quite effectively by this scene: it takes something seriously powerful and deeply ingrained in a character to change something as strong as an instinctual revulsion to same-sex carnal relations like this. This sort of influence is so alien to human sensibilities it makes me wonder if the Faey really are that similar to humans... and it also makes me wonder if the telepathic humans are still human at all.

(Understand that I'm not being anti-gay or bigoted or anything like that. I'm just observing that to change a male's sexual orientation like that requires something completely strange and alien to human sensibilities. There may be males with all sorts of sexual orientations, but the point I'm getting at here is that it's almost unheard of for a serious, set-in-their-ways, straight male to overcome their instinctual revulsion towards gay sex enough to come to the point that Jason has. People can discover they aren't straight after all, or come out of the closet or whatever, but I think that after 27 chapters it's safe to say that before Tim imprinted on him, Jason was straight as the day is long.)